Random Mind Dumplings 12

*I have noticed that since my Fiancee has lost over 75 lbs. this past year, I have been telling a whole lot more fat jokes around her. I swear it's on accident...yes, I do tell jokes on accident from time to time.

*I don't see how an inside message shared only by females on facebook promotes awareness of Breast Cancer. How are you going to promote awareness when only half the population is in on the secret?

*Speaking off facebook, I'm not really comfortable blogging (or "mind dumping") on that site. Trust me, I love an audience...but not one that big. Too many people would get offended at some of the crap that I say. I'll save all my shit-talking for Karma Reaper's Harvest.

*I'm not fully addicted to Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 even though I've spent plenty of hours dodging bullets (well...most bullets) on Xbox Live. Playing that game is a lot like sex; I have to be in the mood before doing it, and I only play it for two minutes at a time, HA! (I was kidding about the two minute thing).

*A good friend of mine who I admire and respect recently mistook my admiration and respect for fear. I hope my friend doesn't learn the difference between respect and fear the hard way.

*Isn't it amazing how popular the word "Douche bag" has gotten the past five years? I wonder if douching has gotten popular as well.

*I have taken my first sick day off the new year; actually my first sick day in months. Sick days would be a lot more enjoyable if sickness wasn't involved.

*I think Tim Andrews of the "Regular Guys" is the Man! He is funny as hell, he is very witty, and he doesn't take shit from ANYBODY!!!! I hate admitting this, but I had a chance to meet him at a Hooters a month ago, but chickened out and buried my face in my hot wings (since I couldn't bury my face in a certain waitress' chest).

*I'm not really a big religious guy, but I honestly have to say that Top Ramen Noodles is God's most gracious gift to college students and people on a tight food budget. I think Dogs are God's gift to men who need someone to blame farts on.

*I'm thinking about posting an x-rated poem that I wrote several years back that got me a decent amount of poon in my "bachelor days." I'm within 74 days no longer being considered single, might as well. The name of the poem is "It Starts With a Smile." Maybe I shouldn't post it...my Mom (the Diva) might read this from time to time.