Humbled & Grateful after Fifteen Years

In the month and year of July 2000, an elderly man decided to buy a chicken dinner from the Deli Department of a local grocery store, a spot he would often pass on his way home from work for a railroad company.  For some weird reason, he asked the wise-cracking, 20-something deli clerk behind the counter one question:  "Can you type?"  The rest is a Karma Reaper love story with Lady Luck.

I showed up to a hiring session where the only criteria was to be able to type 35 words minimum per limit.  65 people showed up for a job not knowing 1) it was not a field position 2) it was a clerical (Clerk) job where typing fast was a requirement and 3) there was going to be drug testing prior to hiring.  Once this was known there was only 7 people left to interview.  Lady Luck not only smiled on my professional career that day, She gave me her hotel room key.

Less than a month later, I turned in my apron at the grocery store deli and became a railroader.  Lady Luck and I have been Friends With Benefits ever since.  I was lucky to be at the store that day and wait on that elderly man.  Grateful is too weak of a word to describe how appreciative I am to have worked with this company for more than a decade and a half.

Two years into working in the Transportation Department as a third-shift Clerk, Lady Luck decided I should move over to the Engineering Department, a group that put up with me for the next dozen years of my railroad career.  Although the engineering projects were challenging, I gravitated towards projects that eliminated grade crossings and crossing hazards, making them safer.  Afterwards, the Safety & Environmental Department called my name in the month and year June 2015 and I was promoted to new role.

I give all of the credit to Lady Luck because my "talent" really only boils down to "Can you type?"  One golden opportunity presented itself and I took full advantage of it for the next 15 years of my life.  I am humbled by the people who continue to work along beside me and grateful for all of the opportunities that I have been presented working for this railroad company.  My joke with my wife is that she'd rather sleep with Mr. Sandman than with me.  I hope she won't divorce me for continuing my affair with Ms. Lady Luck.

It's been a great 15 years.  I'm looking forward to the next 15!

This Is Who You Are...Don't Deny It!

I'm gonna have fun next year.  Politics has always been a game to me and I love playing with people that take it too seriously.  People that think that this country's destiny will really hinge on one person being elected to an office really crack me up.  They crack me up even more when they think this country will go down the tubes because the person they wanted to be elected lost.  When Obama won back in 2008 I was excited...I was excited because I knew people would start bitching about him.  Every president gets bitched about.  The first black president was a perfect target for closet bigots everywhere finding "political" reasons voice their hatred for the most powerful man on the planet.  This is going to be a fun year because I'd love to hear what the closet bigots have to say about THE DON!

Bigots looooooove THE DON and I would love him too if I was one of them.  He tells them everything they want to hear.  He reminds me of that kid in high school that was running for class president that promised the senior class free pizza for lunch and no homework ever again!!!!  Donald Trump is awesome to me because I could never take him seriously.  His supporters are awesome to me too because they are so predictable.  Trump would be a breath a fresh air for those who are having a hard time of coming out of the bigotry closet.  

Let's take a good long look at at Trump's "Diverse" group of supporters.  Actually, it's not going to take that long of a look because it's obvious...they aren't really diverse.  Perhaps Trump's supporters should wonder why everyone who will vote for him are the same color and dislike the same people?  Hey, if you want to be the leader of a diverse country, you might want to reach out to a demographic that is a little bit more...ya know...diverse.  What makes it even better is that he pretty much has the GOP on lock-down!


There is no coincidence here.  I am not some bleeding heart liberal, but I do know that if your platform is obsessed with xenophobia, the Grand Ol' Party is perfect for you.  I don't think all Republicans are xenophobic, but it is easier to be xenophobic when you are running on the GOP ticket...now isn't that strange?  If a Democrat was spouting off at the mouth about illegals coming in this country and non-Christians...he/she would no longer be considered a Democrat.

If Trump gets elected president, there will still be people bitching on Facebook.  The right to Bitch is part of what it is to be an American.  The bitching will just be by the other half of the country.  No one is going to be satisfied and silent when the right to bitch is part of American culture.  Too bad people don't realize that bitching about the problem doesn't solve the problem.

The fact that Trump is bitch-slapping the GOP doesn't surprise me.  He is pretty much telling his audience what they want to hear...can you blame him?  If you have to be a politically incorrect bigot to get votes...GO FOR IT!  I personally want to see if it works, and if it does, the same bigots will claim that Trump was an awesome President (even if he wasn't, but they wouldn't know the difference...most bigots wont).



If everyone's knee-jerk reaction was the way this country was run, we would be in a world of shit.The important question you must ask yourself is this:  Do you really think this country will become a better place if everyone thought exactly alike???  Do you hate Obama so much that you want a former reality TV star to be the next leader of the free world???

Kanye West is going to run in 2020!  His wife has an awesome ass so I'll vote for him.

Budweiser & Biceps

Two of my favorite pastimes are drinking beer and going to the gym.  However, back in June I received a promotion.  Part of my newly acquired job is the requirement to travel and I have been traveling my ass off ever since.  Since this life changing event occurred I have only had time to enjoy one of my two pastimes.  And my body is paying the price for it.

I've gained over ten pounds since I have accepted my new position.  In my old position, I was in town a whole lot more and I was able to run across the street at lunch and get a good hour long work out in daily.  In this new position, I am always in a car, on a plane, in a conference, or in a hotel room wondering where the next conference is and how I'm going to get there.

After sitting in meetings all day, do you want to hit the restaurant or hit the hotel's "fitness center" (I call them mini-gyms)?  Don't get me wrong:  I am not blaming my lack of discipline on my new lifestyle.  My new lifestyle will require more discipline to remain in shape.  If I am not able to enjoy one past time as much as I used to (eh! Going to the gym), then the other past time may have to take a hit as well (gasp! Drinking beer).

In order to hold myself accountable, I have made myself a list of promises so I can retain my sanity as well as regain that impressive physique I once had 10 years ago:

*I have promised myself to drop down to 190 before I start muscle building again.  I do not want Muscle gain to offset the fact that I am trying to reduce Fat.  I'll try to burn the bad stuff off before building the good stuff.  I'll have to stay on the treadmill before I can hit the bench.  At my last physical, the Doctor said that with my frame and stature, I should be around 190.  That should be attainable.  

*I have promised myself not to "binge-snack" past 7:00 pm.  It is real easy for me to sit down and watch a game and mindlessly munch on something salty and/or sweet.  Through the years I have become someone who never eats breakfast.  They say it is the most important meal of the day because you have all day to burn off those calories.  I need to make it so I am hungry in the mornings again and passing out on the couch with a half eaten bag of Doritos isn't the way.

*I have promised to not drink beer during the week, including when I travel.  With the exception of a good Monday Night Football game, I shouldn't really feel the need to knock a few back during "school nights."  Beer used to be what got me through the week.  I could have a shitty Wednesday at the office but would feel good knowing that there were some cold ones waiting for me in the fridge in the man cave at home.

*I have promised to not use travel as an excuse not do work out.  True, I am not a fan of the mini-gyms at all of these hotels where I stay.  But nothing should stop me from jumping on a treadmill, elliptical, or stationary for a half hour no matter the location.  I have even thought of a way to do a workout in a hotel room involving crunches and push-ups.  Sitting down to an evening meal while I am out of town on business will feel a whole lot better knowing that I got my work-out out of the way.

These four promises will be pretty tough to keep but if I am able to stay true to myself and not break any of them, I can enjoy having both Budweiser and Biceps.  Wish Me Luck!

Scowling at Confederate Flags II : The Overreaction to the Overreaction

Breaking News:  A large group of idiots are arguing with another large group of idiots.  One group of idiots are saying the flag must come down because it promotes racism.  The other group of idiots are saying the flag has nothing to do with racism and everything to do with heritage.

Timing is everything.  The flag debate would be a bit more interesting if it took place before 9 people were murdered in Charleston.  It would be even better if it took place before the recent Cop vs. Young Black Male conflicts that further divide the country along racial lines.  

Don't you notice a growing trend these days: a huge political/religious/homosexual/racial (pick one) event or milestone occurs and the country is divided at the outcome.  People flock to sides of battle on social media and post items that will either garner support or fuel debate.  Sometimes I feel as if I'm the only one not chomping at the bit to let the whole world know my opinion for the sake of "likes" on Facebook (or retweets on that other form of social media).

Since you have read this far you shouldn't be surprised that I'll throw my opinion out there now...after all, my opinion should not be surprising based on my previous post titled "Scowling At Confederate Flags":  The flag to racism is like the fork to obesity; it doesn't cause it...but it sure as hell doesn't deter it.  Take a close look at who 98% of the the supporters of the flag are.  Not a very diverse group.  You shouldn't have to explain to a Nazi why the Nazi flag is offensive to some Jews.  You shouldn't have to explain to a Confederate flag supporter why the Confederate flag is offensive to some Blacks.

The flag didn't cause that guy to kill 9 people in Charleston, but it looks really bad that this guy was a huge fan of the flag and put pictures of him posing with it on the internet.  It looks really bad when you really start to think WHY he was a big fan of the flag. You are out of your minds to think the flag has NOTHING to do with racism.  Racism is the reason why he posed with it.  

I grew up on the west coast but I've been in the south for about 18 years now and one thing I know about this south is this; they are very traditional (and the food is phenomenal).  There is more of a historical heritage in this part of the country mainly because it is older than most other parts of the country.  The chances of you finding a 5 generation Georgian are higher than finding a 5 generation Californian.  The non-racists that are defending the Confederate Flag are doing it most likely because their parents did (or would have if put in a similar situation).  That would best explain the South's infatuation with the flag.

The North (hell even sometimes the West) doesn't get off Scott free.  There are bigots everywhere and the bigotry is pointed in multiple directions.  There were kids north of the Mason-Dixon line trying to celebrate their "heritage" with the same flag and everyone saw right through that bullshit.  Either way, bigotry can be displayed in more subtle ways than waving a flag.

Yes, removing the flag EVERYWHERE is a bad idea.  What about the historical sites and the graveyards?  The places were the flag has been flying since the end of the Civil War, what about those places?  How can these flags be found offensive when displayed for historical purposes?  Although people often compare the Confederate flag with the Nazi Flag, the main comparison is that they are both historical.  You can't have blockbusters like Raiders of the Lost Ark and Schindler's List without the Nazi Flag.  You can't have blockbusters like Glory and Lincoln without the Confederate flag.  Most importantly, you can't have the Dukes of Hazard without the General Lee.  The Duke boys never said the N word on the show nor put on white robes and hoods.  Although it was fiction, it is a good example of "heritage."

Don't worry...the flag isn't going anywhere...but it will be under fire for a while.  That among other things will be under fire for quite a while.

Random Mind Dumplings 28

*It seems like more effort is made in picking sides when it comes to dealing with conflicts than finding ways to resolve them these days.

*Facebook has been a good conduit on promoting social activity among the anti-social.  It seems like a lot of people have been using it like a social crutch instead of a social supplement.

*I thought The Interview was funny as hell and I really don't care what the critics have to say about it.  Sony lost their "Man Card" with this whole dilemma.  When you think about it, that move Team America: World Police was much more harsh on Kim Jong Il and that movie didn't raise an eyebrow...it made good money too.

*I'm glad the useless Ebola scare has come and gone, but I wonder what will take its place...

*Can there be anything more narcissistic than a series of solo selfies posted on social media.  Nothing says "I'm so full of myself" than a series of images you took of yourself.  Yes...your mirror works.  Yes...we all know you think you are very attractive.  Yes...we all know that you are soooooo HOT right now and moments like these are temporary to you must take a picture of yourself during this epic moment in time since no one else is around to do it for you.

*And this is for all of you guys out there that call yourself "men" while taking solo selfies.  Unless you are a teenage boy flexing your muscles and trying to get into another teenage girl's pants...give it up.

*The pen is mightier than the crazy radical extremist group that uses the Muslim religion as its excuse to brutally push their archaic barbaric agenda's sword.  Any action against common decency is an action against yourself.

Random Mind Dumplings 27 *FATHERHOOD EDITION PART II*

Last Mother's Day Lady Karma gave birth to yet another Angel.  Exactly eight months ago this Angel was born not breathing on her own and had a very low heart rate.  They had to perform infant CPR on her while she was still in the delivery room.  Me and my wife witnessed it all.

During the delivery, there was a massive amount of blood lost due to an abruption.  The placenta detached during delivery causing my Angel to begin to drown in her own unoxygenated blood.  She was whisked away to Emory Midtown Medical Center in Atlanta.

Distraught, Lady Karma sent a text to the Sunday School class.  While my Angel was being whisked away to another hospital, our entire Sunday School class went to the front of the church and prayed for her.  Afterwards, everyone held their breath.

She spent three weeks in the newborn intensive care unit (NICU).  The first three days they had to lower her body temperature to 94 to reduce and swelling to the brain that may have occurred during the abruption.  She went from not eating on her own to drinking from a nipple fed by a syringe.  She improved to the point to where she was ready to meet her big Sister.

I went through hell, but it is nothing compared to the hell Lady Karma went through.  As if going through labor isn't enough, she was there everyday of the three week ordeal.  She read books to her every chance she could.  She took naps next to her bed.  She was there for it all.  It all paid off though because she was there when the Doctor's announced we could take her home.

It is worth the lack of sleep.  It's worth the nasty vomit-inducing diapers.  It's worth the tantrums in the backseat during road trips.  Her life is worth it.  Her life is worth the stress that comes with parenthood.  Every child's life is worth it.  I feel so in debt to the people that looked out for us, thought of us and prayed for us.  The lovely couple that kept my first angel under their wings while I went to work and Lady Karma went to visit my second angel.

I don't mean to sound corny, but I am very grateful.  I can't loose man points by simply saying that I am grateful for everything.  It was so hard staying strong and not breaking down in front of everybody.  I wanted people to know that if I was OK, everything would be OK...and that was exhausting.  I wanted to break down so bad seeing all of those tubes hooked up to my 3 hour old child.  Now look at her:

I promise to put funny stuff on here in later posts.  Right now I am just enjoying what I call "golden hours" (hours in which the wife, the toddler, and the infant are sleeping in their beds...simultaneously).  Now where the hell is that XBox controller!?!?

Did You Really Think I'd Ditch This Blog, Suckas?!?!?!

Welcome to the new and improved Harvest!

I've been gone for a while...and I missed you a whole hell of a lot more than you missed me.  It seems I may have gotten tired of looking for stuff to bitch about or funny political cartoons to post...or maybe I got tired of bitching about the same stuff and finding the same political cartoons.

The same stuff seems to be going on these days.  People complaining about issues but not proposing solutions.  People overreacting to incidents that don't even affect them.  People getting "offended" by stuff and wanting the whole world to know about it.  People thinking that this country is falling apart because the people that are now in office are not the ones they voted for.

Did I get tired of complaining about people complaining?  

I'm not a very "entertaining" person although I sometimes have an entertaining personality.  But I do like putting thought provoking shit up here from time to time.  I have always addressed my readers as my "invisible audience" but my audience has always been me.  If I can't keep myself posting on this site, no one can.

The next Random Mind Dumplings entry will be about something more important than politics, religion, and funny cartoons.  It will be about a miracle that was delivered Mother's Day of 2014.