February 23, 2012

Random Mind Dumplings 21

*First of all, I would like to bitch slap anyone that complains about the amount of media attention brought to Whitney Houston's death.  The biggest complaint is that she gets more attention than our fallen Heroes in our armed forces.  If every fallen Soldier sold millions of records, generated number various number one hits, and received numerous awards for their musical performances, the media would spend more time covering the unfortunate circumstances of their death as well.  DON'T BE SURPRISED THAT YOU LIVE IN A COUNTRY WHERE OUR CELEBRITIES ARE COMMONLY MORE ADMIRED THAN OUR HEROES.  On average, Celebrities get paid more than Soldiers, Teachers, Firemen, Law Enforcement Officers...etc.  This is nothing new.  Get over it and move on.



*Reference is made to the above picture.  Since when has the word "Credit" been synonymous with Media Coverage?  I do not recall anyone saying that Whitney Houston died for our country.

*Whitney Houston is a lot like Barry Bonds; there is plenty of evidence that shows that she was a talented professional before drugs screwed everything up.  She was not a "drug addict" her whole career.  Death sucks...no matter the cause.  OK, I'm done with the whole Whitney rant now. 



*The "Blame Obama for Everything" Party is starting to blame him for the gas price hike.  Are you dumbasses completely sure Iran has nothing to do with it?  Anyone who knows me knows that I am not a Democrat...but lately I have been SERIOUSLY anti-republican.  The fact that political parties exists in the first place is what is currently fucking this country up.  Four years ago, Democrats were the "Blame Bush for Everything" Party.  I see a pattern forming.

*Whenever I am at work, all I can think about is my daughter and wish I was home with her.  Whenever I am home with her, all I can think about is sleep.  Whenever I am done sleeping, it is time for work.  I see another pattern forming.



*Political debates are like sporting competitions for people that aren't into sports.  I feel like placing a bet on who the GOP nominee is going to be just to make these damn debates more entertaining.  Leap year is like the March Madness...November of Leap year is like the Superbowl.

*If being a great Father was as easy as it is to become a Father, there would be a lot more great Fathers out there.

*Reality TV sucks.  Average people's lives aren't as entertaining as it was back in the early 90's back when "The Real World" first started on MTV.  "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" = Cameramen following around spoiled southern Californian brats who have never worked a day in their lives. "American Pickers" = Cameramen following guys who travel the country buying...junk.  "Swamp People" = Cameramen following Hillbillies that like to fuck with animals that weren't bothering them in the first place.  "Pawn Stars" = Cameramen doing the same thing that the "American Pickers" Cameramen are doing.  "American Idol" = A Nationally Televised karaoke contest.  I miss the good old-fashioned sitcom.



*Things are going to get ugly this November.  The best thing to do is to cast your vote...and then shut the hell up.  I still think this is a damn good country to live in no matter who the President is. 

February 16, 2012

Random Mind Dumplings 20 *FATHERHOOD EDITION!*

*Holy Shit! I was cheated out of 25 days of selfishness and sleep. My beautiful daugher Ryane Elise Jackson was born on January 26th.  Her original due date was Feburary 20th.

*Good things come in little packages: 5lbs. 5oz. 18"

*I do have to admit, I did go back to work too early.  But I really feel inspired to work my ass off to ensure I bring home enough money to feed a FAMILY now.

*Ryane is like Santa Clause.  She knows when we are sleeping.  She knows when we're awake.  She just does the opposite.

*I was so nervous when I changed her first diaper, I almost shit myself...isn't it ironic...don't cha think???

*I have a new found respect for the power-nap.  I have a new found respect for Lady Karma.  Watching her give birth to my heathly Girl took my breath away.  Speaking of "taking breath away," she gets gas a lot...must be from my side of the family.

*25 DAYS EARLY!!!  The night of January 25th and the morning of the 26th is just like being in 5th grade during a fire drill...walking away from the school in an orderly fashion...only to turn around and see that the school was really ON FUCKIN' FIRE!!!

*I have to admit...there was a few times during the labor and delivery where I was like, "wow...this is crazy...there are six people in this room that are looking at Lady Karma's coochie."

*Catching up at work while having a newborn at home is like running a marathon.  It's not the most pleasant experience at times, but it is worth crossing the finish line.

*If I knew she was going to be such a beautiful girl, I would have put a Shotgun on the registry.  I plan on scaring the shit out of teenage boys in the future.


*I really hope that she learns to sleep through the night soon.  When it is time for Lady Karma to go back to work, we'll both have to split 3rd shift duties.